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Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Flying kinda sideways

Lots of changes are happening to me right now. I am not complaining because all of these changes are for the good. Yet there is still an air of uncomfortableness and other emotions venturing into new territory. I am leaving my house of over 20 years. I am leaving my town. I am going through my stuff and determining what to keep, toss, or donate. The keep pile is not as small as I would like it to be. The donate pile is huge. It is huge and is on my front porch waiting for the National Kidney Foundation to pick it up. They said they would be there on Wednesday. I hope so. You almost cannot see my house because of all of the stuff. And I had already made two big trips to Goodwill. This is one more thing I miss about not being in the military. I never had to move myself.

Tom van Hoogstraten

I am downsizing. I was surprised at the things I easily let go of especially the cookbooks. I collect cookbooks or now I can say that I used to collect them. That was a good feeling. Many other books in my library left to find new homes. I have two closets left to go through. One is the hall closet which I am sure holds many treasured items that I have forgotten about. I need someone with me when I excavate that one. Someone to stop me from holding on to all the stuff buried there that I have not touched in years. I really want my mom. Things just seem easier when she is with me even if she just sits there.

Anyway, my sister has come by often to help. And that has been a good thing. We have grown into friends which is a very good thing.

I am feeling a bit overwhelmed. I know this will all work out for the best. I am not doubting this. I am just being honest with my emotions and thoughts. Once the dust settles and I am in a place (still yet to be determined) in Savannah I will breathe much easier. It is a process moving from one thing to another. I am letting go of so much stuff real and imaginary. You know the stuff that I thought would happen and didn't yet I was holding on to. It is what it is or isn't. It is all for the best. I need to just remember to breathe, trust Good, rely on my friends when I need them and enjoy the ride. Better things are ahead.

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