Flying when the THING isn't coming

I got confirmation late Friday that the THING I was waiting for is not coming. So, I guess it really wasn't my THING eventhough I wanted it to be. I thought I saw the signs that said it was my THING, but I guess I did not. Now I am not sure what I saw. I stepped out on faith. I bought the suit for the interview. I even bought an outfit for the second interview. I even changed my passwords to positive affirmations about the THING. I put it in my magic creation box. This was supposed to happen. Okay, apparently not since it didn't.

Yes, I am bummed. Yes, I read and re-read all that stuff about things happening for a reason, about not getting this means that there is something much better for me out there, and about trusting in the universe. I read and re-read all of the quotes that are plastered to my bathroom mirrors, but right here, right now none of that is soothing my soul.

I do not have a Plan B. Well, as a sister girlfriend told me that Plan B is status quo. I don't like status quo, but it pays the bills. I am at the end of all I know again. More confusing is that someone sent me a job posting for a job in Dallas. Great salary, not exactly what I want to do right now, and not exactly where I want to live. I do not want to live in Dallas. But what if that is a sign. Yes, I know, I have misread the previous signs. Maybe it is time for me to leave here. Maybe I need to try Dallas again. I asked God to give me a recognizable, unmistakable, and undeniable sign if I am supposed to go to Dallas. Nothing has happened yet. Maybe I am really not paying attention. Maybe I just cannot see anything through the disappointment right now.

I am hoping that in time, I will look back on this and say that it was good that this THING did not happen for me. I have said that before about other opportunities. I just really wanted this one. I know, I know, get over it. In time there will be another THING. I just have to wait my turn.